7 Body Language Signs That Mean Someone Is Attracted to You, According to Therapists
YOU MIGHT WANT TO CHECK FOR THESE SUBTLE CLUES NEXT TIME YOU'RE FLIRTING.
Putting yourself out there is not easy. When we admit our feelings toward another person, we open ourselves up to the possibility of rejection—and there are few more dreaded experiences. That's why instead of being direct, we often take a less straightforward approach when we're into someone, even if we don't realize we're doing it. According to therapists and other relationship experts, body language can easily give you away when you're talking to a person that you're interested in. Read on to find out the seven most common signs that indicate attraction.
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They look at different parts of your face.
The way someone looks at you can indicate their level of attraction. In a TikTok video, Kim Chronister, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist working in Beverly Hills, California, said that "one major sign that someone is attracted to you" is when their eyes scan all over your face.
According to Chronister, a person who sees you strictly as a friend will typically just look at you from eye to eye when you're talking to them. "But what you want to see if you're into the person is them scanning your entire face," she said. "So looking at your eyes, your lips, your hair, back to your eyes, lips, hair—something like that."
They make the space between you smaller.
If you want to know if someone is attracted to you, watch how close they get to you. Jess O'Reilly, PhD, a sexologist and relationship expert working with Astroglide, tells Best Life that most people tend to close the space between themselves and another person if get find them attractive.
"When you experience attraction, you may find yourself behaving in unexpected ways," she says. "You may find yourself leaning in toward someone to whom you're attracted without even noticing it."
At the same time, you can also gauge if someone is attracted to you as well by seeing how they respond to you reducing the space between you both.
"When somebody lets you close to their intimate zone, this is almost a guarantee that they are attracted to you," explains Rodney Simmons, a relationship expert and author at Tiny Changes Matter. "If they let you close to their face or they lean in close to your intimate zone, that's a green light for you."
They smile at you.
People fake a smile for all kinds of different reasons, whether they're just being polite or they feel uncomfortable. But Kerry Lauders, a mental health officer at Startups Anonymous, tells Best Life that the simple act of smiling is also one of the most common body language signs of attraction. And it's typically easy to tell if you're receiving a genuine smile or not.
"Body language is a very primal way of communicating, so it can be difficult to fake," Lauders notes.
Laughing and smiling can also indicate engagement and pleasure, as well as attraction, according to O'Reilly. "Multiple studies have examined laughter as a key ingredient to romantic attraction and courtship," she says.
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They initiate physical touch.
It may be as simple as a fleeting hand on your shoulder or brushing their leg against yours. But even attempts at casual touch are likely a clear sign that someone is into you, according to sociologist and clinical sexologist Sarah Melancon, PhD.
"When we are attracted to someone, we want to feel their presence—and this is not just metaphorical," she says.
According to Melancon, physical touch causes the release of oxytocin, otherwise known as the "love hormone." When this is released, it can help us "feel closer [and] more connected" to someone, she explains.
They appear more nervous around you.
Many people still get nervous around the people they're into, even if they're long past the days of high school crushes. According to Amelia Prinn, a relationship expert working with HerWay.net, someone who is attracted to you might engage in several nervous behavior patterns, including blushing every time they're near you, tripping over their words, or having their palms get sweaty.
Joseph Puglisi, a relationship expert and the CEO of Dating Iconic, adds that they might also act fidgety all over and stammer a lot. "These signs indicate attraction because there's a lot of rush in their hormones, so they tend to act on it," he says, adding that this can sometimes cause nervous body language and awkward actions.
They make adjustments to how they come across.
Despite potential nervousness, it's second nature to try putting your best foot forward when attraction is on the line.
"When we are attracted to someone, we often try to present ourselves in the best light possible. This can include preening behaviors such as fixing our hair or straightening our clothes," Simmons says. "If you notice that the person you are interacting with is exhibiting these behaviors, it could be a sign that they are attracted to you."
And it's not just about physical appearance. People may also change the tone of their voice when talking to someone they're attracted to as a way to make themselves appear more appealing, according to Prinn.
"For example, men may deepen their voices so that they appear more dominant, whereas women tend to make their voices more high-pitched," she points out. "This behavior is often subconscious."
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They mirror your body language.
Another way someone might try to improve how they come across to a person they're attracted to is through utilizing mirrored responses, according to O'Reilly. "Some research suggests that when you mimic the body language of others, you are more likely to be seen as likeable and persuasive," she says.
It's not necessarily on purpose either. Simmons says people "often unconsciously mirror the body language" of those they find attractive. "If you notice that someone is crossing their legs when you cross yours, it could be a sign that they are attracted to you," he suggests.
This also indicates that there may be a natural bond between you, according to Prinn. "They're connected with you on a deeper level which means their body language is in tune with yours," she says. "So, whenever you find yourself touching your forehead or drinking, they'll do the same without even knowing it. It's their body's way of letting you know that you are in sync."